Do you really have the mind it takes to be married?

Sometimes I wish there are ways you can totally express how you feel inside to your spouse, but like a wise mentor recently said ‘If you express everything on your inside, your marriage may not last long’ and I kind of truly agree with him. It’s sad that most people especially females have retreated into their self because they’ve been given the tag NAG, just because they decided to express themselves.

Some elderly good people once said as a wife, you live for your children not for your spouse and if you take a good look around, you will notice that’s gradually becoming the trend. Some women have seen their friends go from happy to laid back in their marriages and have decided that they would rather be single moms, others try to share what they are going through in their marriages, but when they hear from others, they just keep mum.

My FOREVER Best Friend....

It was just one Saturday morning, I was going about my official duties at work. I had just finished attending to a customer and was filing away a complaint on his behalf when this elderly man walked up to me. He wanted to pay for his postpaid line, he also wanted to roam his line because he was travelling for Hajj, he was filling his request form when he abruptly looked up and stared at me, then he asked with a smile, 'How long have you been married?, I answered '3years sir'..., he smiled again 'any kids? I answered 'just one sir' by now he got me wondering where the conversation was heading. Then he said to me 'Whatever you do, make your husband your best friend, don't hide anything from him no matter how bad, friends will come and go but only your true love will stand by you'.

The EX-Syndrome....

This issue has become a cause of worry in most homes. If you are single and in a relationship, if for any reason you decide to part with him/her, your reasons must be genuine enough not to fall back into temptation in the future. Let me delve further, when you get married, there's this kind of glow that exudes from your being that gives you a new look that makes everyone compliment you. That is when you hear comments like 'wow, it's good to be married'. At this point, you must know that it's not just our friends, colleagues and family that are watching, your ex(es) as the case may be are also watching.

The way and manner you parted doesn't matter, all eyes are on you now. Do not however be deceived that since you are now married, you can just be friends with them, you should understand that there's just this natural force of attraction marriage brings. This is the time some of them will call you out of the blues just to wish you a happy married life and from there call once in a while to check up and before you know they become family friends.

Discover HONOUR by leading the way

Honour for your spouse supercedes wearing your wedding ring. For most of us women, the ring becomes tight when we are pregnant and we sometimes have to take it off. So the ring is just a means to an end but not the end itself. Honour is a mentality, it is not what you just bump into, it is a course on its own. A definition says "To have high esteem or regard" yet another says "To fulfil an obligation or keep an agreement". Sometimes we feel we know the meaning of a word but ...you would be shocked at the various definitions of that word if you take time to research it.
 
From the above meanings, we can safely conclude that when you speak about your spouse amongst your friends in a "playful or naughty" way, you do not honour them. When you do anything contrary to your marriage vows, then you have broken the rules of honour. These things sometimes look simple but everyone of us have at one point of our marriage broken the rules. The good thing however is that we are in a school we pray never to graduate from and so learning is continuous. We can always make up for the past because year in, year out, our experiences makes us more mature.